Thursday, November 7, 2024

Do You Need 300 Pieces of China in Your Victorian Parlor? Spoiler Alert: Yes, Obviously

Let’s get something straight: If you’re decorating a Victorian parlor, one teapot isn’t. going. to. cut. it. You’re going to need a lot more than that—at least 300 pieces of china, minimum. Why? Because the Victorians knew that more is more, and if you could still see any surface of your parlor, you clearly weren't putting in enough effort.

In the 1800s, parlors meant more than just a room, they made a statement. They showed off that you had enough time, money, and sheer willpower to accumulate as many fragile, delicate, and completely impractical as you could. China topped this list. Porcelain, ceramic, gilded—if it was breakable, it belonged in the parlor.

Every Available Surface Should Be Covered—Preferably Twice

Victorian parlors had no space for minimalism. Empty surfaces meant you were failing at life. Mantels, side tables, windowsills—every inch of your parlor needed to be occupied by something adorned and unnecessary. Your china collection serves as a good example, artfully (and I use that term loosely) displayed over every available inch.

Teacups, plates, saucers—these weren’t just for tea time. They were for every time. Especially if that time involved someone coming over to marvel at your good taste. Victorian interior decorating was about making sure every visitor knew that you owned at least three times the amount of tableware necessary to feed a small army.

But Is It Hand-Painted? If Not, Please Leave Immediately

Anyone can buy a teapot. But is it painted by hand? Does it have tiny detailed floral patterns that will never see the light of day because no one dares actually use it? If the answer is no, I’m afraid you’re simply not cut out for the parlor life.

During the china-painting craze, entire magazines were dedicated to helping genteel women paint intricate designs on their ceramics making sure each piece was as unique (and as unused) as possible.

More Is More: The 300 Rule

In a Victorian parlor, a few items was a starting point. Two or three pieces of china? Please. Come back when you have at least 300. Your collection should be sprawling enough to require its own cabinet, perhaps even its own room. If you haven’t had to install extra shelving to hold your burgeoning horde of teacups, you’re simply not doing it right.

People expected the abundance of decorations. A well decorated room had walls, surfaces, and maybe even the air packed with items, all vying for attention. After all, why have one vase when you could have 17? And if those vases happen to be fragile, expensive, and completely impractical, pshhh even better.

Matching Sets Are For Amateurs

Victorians didn’t care about matching. In fact the more mismatched your collection the better. Each piece of china should have its own story. You might have bought it at a high end auction or found it in a dusty corner of a secondhand shop. What matters is that you own it now, and it’s going on display.

Victorians loved to mix and match creating a chaotic, over-the-top look that felt deliberate (even if it looked like a ceramics factory exploded in your sitting room). Patterns clashed, colors popped and your guests were left wondering if they’d walked into a museum—or maybe a flea market.

Good Luck Dusting

Of course, there’s a tiny drawback to cramming your parlor with china: the maintenance. All those fragile items need attention, which means dusting. A whole lot of dusting. But then again, no one ever said being a Victorian was easy.

So while you might spend your afternoons cleaning 300 teacups just keep in mind—you’re doing it for the look. The beauty. The sheer satisfaction of knowing that no one absolutely no one will ever be able to out-decorate you.

And that, my friends, is the true spirit of Victorian interior decorating.

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